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Jun
25
I’m probably going to keep saying thank you for the kind comments, over and over. It means so much to me to read them, and I appreciate you guys so much.
I almost had a blogging breakdown earlier this week. I wondered why can’t I just blog and ignore my real life. Why can’t I just write fluffy, happy stuff and pretend that the sun always shines, just for a blog post. But I can’t. I don’t blog to be “fluffy”, I blog for me and hopefully for a few others, but more than that, I’ve committed to blogging “real”. Not fluff. I was really considering shutting it down, because I can’t be fake and I don’t like my reality right now.
I don’t feel like blogging real right now. To be honest, I don’t feel like doing anything. I feel myself slipping back to depression; for a while I felt like I was moving in the opposite direction, but the events of the past few weeks have just overwhelmed me. I can’t sleep, I’m anxious and distracted, I can’t eat, I can’t focus. And the thought of trying to write a semi decent blog post makes me even more stressed. I love blogging, and I don’t want to do it if it feels like a chore. I want to enjoy it, and then maybe people might enjoy what I write.
I’m trying to balance my family, my summer classes, and my jobs with going back and forth to be with my parents while my dad is in the hospital. I’m also trying to manage the worries that are overtaking me right now, and I’m not doing a good job of that. I’m just not good at juggling too many things; I wish I was. I wish my emotions didn’t take over and make me feel fragile and jittery right when I need to be strong and stoic. I wish there were about 10 more hours in the day.
I’m going to try to peek in here at least once a week; I finally felt like I was becoming part of a blogging community and I hate to take a break from that. But something has to give right now, til I figure out what I need to do for me.
I know many of you are struggling with different things right now, too, so please know that while I may not have responded to emails yet, I am thinking of and praying for all of you. And I always, always welcome and appreciate your prayers and kind words.
I am trying to get caught up here even if I’m not blogging. I am going to email the winners of the giveaways from earlier this month today, and I’ll post the winners’ names here when I’ve heard back from all of them. I haven’t forgotten that, it just got pushed back on my list of things to do.
I hope everyone is having a great summer. And I really hope you all will be here when I get my head on straight and can start posting again regularly.
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Jun
21
It seems like months since I was here, online. I haven’t looked at my blog, haven’t checked my reader or email in several days. Part of me just didn’t want to come back. I’m so tired, my heart is just worn out.
I meant to just peek in here real quick; I just got home and am unpacking and trying to straighten out my life that I’ve had to neglect here. I had almost convinced myself that I shouldn’t even get online. I’m so glad I did.
I don’t have time to respond to the very kind comments right now, but I wanted to let you all know that your sweet, encouraging words brought tears to my eyes – even though I was sure I was all cried out. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment and write and pray. It means so much, especially right now.
My head is still spinning from everything that’s happened in the past week. My dad is still in bad shape, but he did get to attend my uncle’s funeral. There was no way to keep him from that. I didn’t want to go to this funeral, but I got to see some family members that I hadn’t seen in decades, and I am grateful for that. Many people commented how sad it is that it takes a funeral to bring us together, and I agree. But life goes on.
It did my dad good to see his brothers and other relatives, but we all could see that his heart is broken over the death of his closest brother. This was completely unexpected; a routine procedure went terribly wrong. The doctors tried everything they could, but after awhile, my aunt said to stop. She wanted him to be at peace, even if that meant losing her husband and best friend.
It makes you wonder how it is possible for so many sad things to happen so quickly. I’m refusing to go down that road though. Doubt and anger and bitterness never lead anywhere good. Instead, I’m focusing on praying for my aunt, for my dad and mom, and for all my family. I’m telling my husband and kids stories about my dad and his brothers, remembering the good.
I need to get my house in order, and after more than a week of emotional turmoil, I am actually looking forward to mundane tasks like laundry and picking up after my sons. Since I’ve been on this necessary blogging break, my baby has turned 13, and in a few days, my oldest will turn 15. We’ve got some make-up celebrating to do here, and I need that even more than they do. I need to wrap myself in my life, in the people that I live with and love, and try to overcome the sadness that has surrounded me for the past several days. Because life does go on, and it is still good, so very good.
Slowly but surely I will get my email box cleaned out, and I will respond to your sweet comments. Slowly is the key word though. Life does go on and the world does keep turning, but I think it’s okay to slow it down a little. Too often I find myself fast forwarding through life, frantically trying to get things done and check them off my to-do list. I realized these past few days that life is not a to-do list that needs to be completed. It’s okay to just meander through sometimes, and accomplish nothing more than being. Just being is enough.
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Jun
17
I am behind. Behind in blogging, behind in returning emails, behind in everything. I’ve been with my parents most of this week, but in addition to my dad’s health problems, earlier this week my uncle passed away completely unexpectedly. I rushed home to gather clothes for a funeral and am heading back to Kansas today.
This is a sad week. This uncle was my dad’s best friend; they talked on the phone every day, several times a day. His death has sent my dad deeper into the depression he was already sinking into over his own health problems. His brother was ten years younger than my dad.
I will be home for good this weekend; as much as I would like to stay with my family and try to help them right now, I need to get take care of my own family and life here. So I will be back, and will slowly get caught up with everything. If you’re waiting on an email from me, please be patient. I’ll get back on track soon.
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Jun
11
This is one of those “how do I write this” kind of posts, but I feel like I should write something. I started this post three times already, floundering with each one. I wanted to write about my busy life, how I’m already behind and it’s just mid June. I wanted to apologize for being behind on blog reading and commenting. What I want to write about is anything except what needs to be said.
My dad is having some complications following what should have been a minor surgery, including blood clots. I’m not sure if any surgery is minor for a 77 year old with as many health issues as he has, though. This latest problem is serious enough that my mom asked us to come, so we’re going.
It’s easier for me to let myself get wrapped up in the chaos of my life than to let myself reflect on the seriousness of the things going on with my extended family. I’ve got problems, we all do, but mine aren’t life threatening. I can’t wrap my brain around “life threatening”, so I avoid thinking about it. I’m scared of going. I’m scared of seeing anyone I love in the hospital. I’m scared of seeing the people that I love afraid. I’m scared of seeing my parents scared, because that’s not how it’s supposed to be.
But it is. It’s how it always is. It’s the circle of life; they take care of us, then we take care of them. So I’ll push my fears back, and go where I don’t want to go. Face what I don’t want to face.
This is why it’s so hard to write about this. I feel selfish for writing about my feelings and my fears. This isn’t about me. My husband and I talk about how we’ve never lost a close a family member, meaning parents, siblings or children. Even the grandparents we have lost happened years ago, when we were children, so we can’t remember it well. We talk about how we’re “not ready” for death. Despite our talk, I know that no one is ever truly ready for that season of life when weddings and celebrations turn to funerals and grieving.
Pray for my dad, and for my mom. They are scared, and I know he has fallen deeper and deeper into depression these last few months. Pray for me, that I’ll find words that comfort and give hope. That I won’t be too afraid to be where I’m needed.
That I’ll have the courage to face the important things, and let the rest go.
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Jun
9
This post is part 1 of a 15 week series sponsored by Mommy’s Piggy Tales. This week’s assignment is our birth story.
Growing up, I always felt like my parents had to be the oldest parents of all the kids in my classes. I was obsessed with this fact; I would look at old yearbooks and figure out how old my friends’ parents were, which was usually at least five years younger than my parents. When I was born, my mom was 31, and my dad was 36.
I understand now that my parents didn’t wait til they were in their thirties by choice. I was born in 1969, and people didn’t typically wait that long to have kids. By that time, they felt like they would never have the baby they so desperately wanted. But they did, and here I am.
I was born two months premature; I don’t remember my exact weight, but I was right around three pounds. Back then, it was a miracle that I survived.
I was supposed to Kimberly Sue, but when I arrived, apparently I did not look like Kimberly Sue. So I’m Sheri Renee. I think it fits better.
I can’t tell my birth story without including my brother’s birth story. He was born two months early too, nine months after me. He is truly the miracle child though. After all the years it took to have me, my parents didn’t think they’d ever get pregnant again, and certainly not that quickly. My mother had heart problems at a young age, along with a host of other medical issues. She had to have exploratory surgery a few months after I was born, and the doctors found a mass. That mass turned out to be my brother, completely unplanned and unexpected. Two miracles, after waiting for so long.
She told me these stories all the time, making sure I always knew how very wanted I was. I realize that now.
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Jun
7
Both my boys have June birthdays, so we have celebrations on the brain around here. We don’t go crazy with parties, but we have had parties for them when they were younger, and they’ve gone to many summer birthday parties, too. When my kids were little, we would have a combined party for both of them, since they had the same friends. Now that they are older, we don’t usually do big parties, but instead we’ll let them pick one or two friends to do something with. I thought I’d share some of our favorite parties – some we hosted, some my kids attended. Here we go, counting down to number 1:
10. An art party. When my kids were younger, they were invited to an arts and crafts party by the sister of one of their buddies. This probably wouldn’t go over too well at their ages now, but for six and seven year olds, it was a huge success. This family set up card tables in their garage and had two simple crafts for each kid to work on. Even my not-so-artsy child enjoyed this party.
9. Gymnastics party. My sons were friends with some kids that took gymnastics, and they had a party at the local gymnastics school. They were about five years old, and the kids absolutely had a blast. This is probably pretty typical of any party at a business; they had the party room for presents and cake. But here the big attraction was the gymnastics rooms, with ropes to climb, foam pits to jump into and general rowdiness.
8. Party at the park. We did this several times as a combined party for both of them. This was years ago, but I’m pretty sure we were able to rent a covered eating area at local parks for around $20-$25 dollars for 2-3 hours. We did this as a potluck with extended family or just with cake for friends. This is one of the easiest, low maintenance parties we ever did. Which is a big deal for mom 
7. Party at the movie theatre. My kids have been to lots of these. Our local theatre has a couple party rooms for the cake and presents and an arcade. You can pay extra for a private movie viewing room, or just watch the movie in the regular theatre – the kids really don’t care.
6. Party at the drive-in movie theatre. We did this for our son a couple years ago; he chose two friends and we saw the Cars movie. It was a huge hit with the boys. I had forgotten how fun a drive-in is, and I loved it too.
5. Party at the amusement park. My son was invited to celebrate a friend’s birthday at a local amusement park. The birthday boy chose three friends to spend the evening riding the rides and eating the junk food. This was a small amusement park; I don’t know if I’d attempt this in one of the large mega parks. But I’m a chicken that way, lol.
4. Sleepover party. There are endless variations on this party theme. We were never content with the plain old sleepover, so we had to mix it up. That usually meant sleeping outside in our tent that we use for Boy Scout camping. Throw in smores, root beer floats, and late night flashlight tag outside in the dark, and the kids had a great time. These kinds of parties are my favorite, and it’s the kind that we did most often: inexpensive, easy, and a lot of fun.
3. A paintball party. This has become a recent favorite; we did this last year for Nolan. Something about shooting your friends with globs of paint and causing lovely welts and bruises – ?? I may not understand it, but they love it.
2. A swim party. We did this years ago as a combined party for both boys. A small town about twenty miles away would let you rent the public pool for several hours in the evening. We had called all over to price this party, and this small town pool was cheaper than any party option we checked into. Since it wasn’t at my house, we didn’t have to deal with clean up or space constrictions. We brought food and drinks and shared with the teenage lifeguards; they really made the party fun for the kids. The boys still talk about how great this party was. I’d have to agree.
And the #1 birthday party that we have ever had (drumroll):
Party in the backyard. Yes, it’s true. We would fill hundreds, maybe thousands (ok, that’s an exaggeration) of water balloons, fill up the kiddie pool, turn on the sprinkler and let them get soaked. We did this several times, starting when they were in preschool and on up, usually as a combined party. This does mean a lot of clean up for the parents, but it’s so easy to do. Sometimes we would have cake, sometimes a cookie cake, sometimes we’d do snack foods. The kids didn’t care about the food, they just loved the water play. These parties went on for hours, and my boys slept like a rock when it was over. I miss those backyard parties.
There you have it; our favorite birthday parties. Feel free to share yours in the comments – I can always use new ideas, especially for older kids.
This post is part of Top Ten Tuesday at ohamanda.
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Jun
7
Rain in the summer. Not sure if I approve of this. I’m one of those moms that tells her kids “Go play outside” all summer long, so this rain is cramping my style! Also, it makes me want to curl up and sleep all day, and I can’t do that. At least my dog can, he’s taking full advantage of the rain and snoring the day away. Lucky.
I’ve recovered from my garage sale, I just have to make a trip to Goodwill now. No way am I putting everything back! My summer classes start tomorrow, so it’s back to the grind with lots of reading. June is a big birthday month for us, and we start the birthday fun this Saturday. We don’t do much, but I will bake something. He’s kind of untraditional, he may choose birthday pie instead of birthday cake
Link up your Monday post here; it doesn’t matter what it’s about.
Here are the guidelines for my Monday Motivation blog carnival:
1. You can link up your Monday post no matter what its about, even if you have linked it somewhere else. Anything goes! This is all about sharing our posts.
2. Copy the permalink to your post in the Monday Motivation linky. Make sure it’s the link to your post, not your homepage.
3. Enter your name and post title in the linky.
4. Please include a link back to this Monday Motivation post in your post. Leave a comment after you link up.
5. Share the love! Visit the other links in the list. I’ll be visiting and spreading some Twitter luv for all the links
6. Grab my button if you want to.
I will keep the linky open until Wednesday at midnight. Link up anytime! This is just a fun way to share our posts and get some link and Twitter luv. Thanks for joining in.
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Jun
6
Visit Blogher and answer my question for a chance to win $100! “What would you flaunt..if you had it?”
Here’s my answer: On a very basic, superficial level, I would flaunt beautiful fingernails if I had them. Instead, I have these mangled, ripped nails that I can’t seem to leave alone. I think I have had nice nails maybe two times in my life, and even then they were barely there. But at least they weren’t torn and ripped to the quick! Of course, a flat stomach is right up there with healthy, pretty nails, but I’ve given up on that completely! And these days, no one sees my stomach, but it’s harder to hide unsightly fingernails. Oh the shame!
Go now and answer my question for a chance to win! You have until 5pm Monday, June 7.
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Jun
6
I haven’t been able to write about this until now, even thought it has been on my mind constantly since I read about it. The death of blogger Katie Granju’s son Henry has just filled my heart with such sadness. I didn’t know her, I hadn’t read much of her blog until there was so much online about her writing about her son’s addiction. But as a mom, regardless of whether or not I personally know her or her family, this hits me hard.
Of all the issues and problems that we face as parents, this is the one that scares me to death. This grips my heart and keeps me up at night.
With so many things in life, for kids and adults, you make mistakes and learn from them. Learning from your mistakes is a good result, and we often get the chance to make the right choice another time. We get a do-over. But with some things, there are no do-overs, no chance to make it right.
Part of the reason drugs and drug addiction scares me so much is that I have zero experience with it. In the tiny town I grew up in, I didn’t have access to drugs. I didn’t know anyone my age or around my age that did drugs. I heard rumors of adults doing drugs, but even that was rare. I’m afraid I wouldn’t recognize the signs of drug use until it was too late. Thankfully, the years my husband spent working with juveniles in the probation system gave him a huge education in this area. But that’s not really reassuring to me. Recognizing the signs means my kid has already crossed a line, a choice that could kill him. I don’t want to have to be able to recognize the signs. I don’t want it to ever get to that point.
We know people and have heard of people in our community that have lost children to drugs. Sometimes it is because of an overdose after years of addiction. Sometimes it is a first time drug user. Either way, it is heartbreaking.
Recently we learned that local kids as young as 11 or 12 were buying over the counter medication and taking huge amounts to get high. Several kids ended up in the hospital. The 18 year old that was buying it for most of them was arrested. That is also not reassuring. How far will kids go to get high? Huffing, over the counter medication, what else is there? And how much younger will the kids get that are doing this?
I wrote back in August about random drug testing at my son’s 6th grade. My rant back then, and now, is that drug testing at schools isn’t the answer. If my child fails that drug test, we are already on a path we never want to be on. We are already in serious trouble. I don’t have any answers, but I know that a failed drug test is a wake call that came too late.
I have talked to my sons about drugs so many times that they might roll their eyes if I bring it up again. But I will. My oldest has told me stories of kids his age and younger doing drugs, bringing drugs to school, coming to school high. These stories started when he was in the 7th grade.
I told my son that we love him, we want to guide him as he grows up, and we want to be able to trust him. He continues to earn more and more trust as he makes good choices. I also told him that if we think he isn’t able to make good choices, if we think he isn’t strong enough to resist peer pressure when it comes to things like drugs, we will make some hard decisions of our own. I won’t hesitate to pull either of my children out of school if I think it’s warranted. If I think they’ve gotten in with a crowd that is leading them down a dark path, and if I think they aren’t able to get off that path themselves, I will do whatever I have to do to keep my children safe and alive.
My son was kind of shocked when I said that. His jaw dropped, and he asked if I would really ever take him out of school. Absolutely, in a heartbeat, I’ll do whatever is best. He didn’t like that; even though he insists that he would never do drugs, he didn’t like the idea that I would do something that drastic. Like every teenager, he doesn’t think that anything bad will ever happen to him. He sees kids doing drugs, huffing, marijuana, and alcohol, and he sees them functioning okay. Maybe not functioning well, maybe getting suspended and expelled, but not dying.
He’s right, lots of people do drugs and don’t die. Lots of people do drugs and live relatively normal lives. I guess that’s true, because while my kids know people that do drugs, I do not.
I don’t care how many people do drugs and are fine. Because not everyone is fine. Many end up like Katie’s boy. Many lives are destroyed, and not just the lives of the people using drugs. My husband has seen parents and grandparents sent to prison time and time again, because they cannot stop. How many lives does that destroy?
You just don’t know if you will be the one who can’t stop, who has to keep using stronger drugs, who ends up dead of an overdose or a beating at the hands of drug dealers. You don’t know, so using drugs even one time is a gamble with your life. That’s a gamble that I’m not willing to take; I am not willing for them to take it either.
My heart is hurting for the Granju family. I cannot imagine losing a child in any circumstance, but to lose a child like that, there are just no words. Her willingness to share their story with the hope of helping other families is heroic. And it may be the wake up call that some people need to start an ongoing dialogue with their children about drugs. Growing up, my parents never talked to me about drugs. They were lucky; I made many mistakes, but not that one. I can’t close my eyes and hope that I will be that lucky with my kids.
I used to think that I wanted to shield my kids from news stories about these kind of things. I didn’t want them to watch the news and hear about drug abuse, child abductions, or sexual predators. Now I want them to know the dangers. I want them to know that drug use, even one time, can kill you. If it doesn’t kill you, it can put you on a course that leads to hell, for you and your loved ones. It can destroy your life.
I don’t have any answers. I don’t know how to make them fully understand the danger. All we can do is watch them closely, monitor them closely, and talk to them constantly. We’re talking and they’re listening. I hope and pray that it’s enough.
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Jun
5
I forgot that getting ready for a garage sale is hard work. I’m used to hard work, but not such hard physical labor. My back aches, my arms hurt, my feet are killing me, and the sale hasn’t started yet!
Even though I won’t be doing any reading this weekend, I hope you will check out these great posts that I found over the past week. Enjoy, and think of me with all my aches and pains.
Multi-tasking Mama ~ Overcoming the Sense of Entitlement Are kids today growing up thinking they are entitled to the biggest and the best that life has to offer? I love this post!
Manumit ~ Filling in the Cracks A beautiful post about helping.
Ann Kroeker ~ People and Privacy Are we choosing privacy over relationships?
The Moonboat Cafe ~ Walking With God What does walking in faithfulness mean to you?
The High Calling Blogs ~ Yes or No Getting away from the “lazy, automatic no”.
Odd Mom ~ Sage and Thyme Marinated Chicken Breasts These look delicious, and easy enough that even I won’t ruin them.
Rants and Rambles ~ Folding Up My Map Beautiful reminder that He has already charted a perfect course for our lives.
This post is linked at Saturday Stumbles at It’s Come 2 This
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My boys
Where did those little guys go?Cuteness overload
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