Jul

24

Bad mom confessions




I may as well just come right out and admit it.  I’ve written plenty several a couple posts proclaiming the joys of being the mom of 2 boys, so now it’s time for some honest confessions.

There are some things about having kids that I don’t like.

Yes, it’s true.  I can try to deny it, I can sugarcoat things and attempt to cover up my shortcomings, but I think I should just let it all out.

I have a real problem with certain things that my kids love, the biggest one being sleepovers. I went to lots of sleepovers as a child, but looking back one thing stands out in my mind: I never had a sleepover at my house. Hmm, wonder why that would be?? Is it possible that my parents never wanted to be responsible for entertaining a houseful of goofy girls? I can totally relate to that.

When they were younger, my kids always wanted to try to sleepover, but inevitably I’d get the call around 11pm or midnight to come get them. Which was fine, I didn’t mind that. But when we had children over to spend the night and they wanted to call their parents to pick them up, I took it way too personal. I felt like I had failed. It was crushing.

So when they got a little older, I felt like I had to be super mom, with an exciting array of fun activities and snacks  planned.   I gave up on that after having one of my sons little friends over a couple of years ago. At the time my son hadn’t had many friends sleep over, at least none that had lasted the night. So I planned a movie, pizza, and ice cream sundaes afterwards. I let my son come with me to pick out everything, so it was all ready for the big night.

We left the movie, which was fun, and I excitedly announced, cheese pizza at home! Our esteemed guest announced that he was lactose intolerant and couldn’t eat dairy. For a minute I didn’t catch it, then I realized what he’d said. Ok, fine, no problem, we’ll just make a quick stop at a drive through for  him.

 In my eagerness to win the sleepover of the year prize, I made the mistake of saying “whatever you want to eat”. What I meant to say was “whatever is cheap and on the drive home”.  By the time I drove all over town to the closest McDonald’s, I was not such a happy mama. And it was late, so my brain was not functioning well. So when we walked in the house, I said “now you guys can make ice cream sundaes“.  Yeah, I wasn’t thinking straight. As I was explaining to my husband why we were so late, because of the lactose intolerance issue, he gave me a funny look. That’s when I woke up from my daze and realized, our special guest couldn’t eat ice cream, either. All my marvelous plans out the window.

Now before you think I’m bashing kids, or anyone, who can’t eat dairy, just keep reading. Because I’m definitely not. And this story is far from over.

My son, who was pretty young, had his heart set on those ice cream sundaes that he had lovingly picked out the toppings for. I tried to talk him out of it, out of respect for his friend, but he was not having it. Did I mention it was late? He was tired and cranky too by now. So I said his friend could eat some of the gummy candy we got for topping, while my son made his sundae.

His friend watched while my son elaborately decorated his ice cream with 7 toppings and globs of hot fudge. I watched too, waiting for the tears to start. And I did feel sorry for him. But instead of crying, he turns to me and informs me that even though he is lactose intolerant, he eats ice cream all the time. Being such a smart mommy, I recognized this for what it was, a desperate attempt to get to partake in the ice cream extravaganza. I felt sorry for him, but I had to gently tell him that I couldn’t do that, since it would probably make him sick. Wouldn’t it?

He insisted he could have it. I did the only thing I could do, because he was getting quite agitated. I called his mom. I apologized profusely, and explained that I hadn’t known about the lactose issue and had got all this food that he couldn’t eat. There was a long pause, then “lactose intolerant?” Then laughter. Hysterical laughter.

Apparently in this child’s family the father had some digestive issues that had nothing to do with lactose but everything to do with gas. So as a family joke, whenever they ate food that caused this gas problem, the dad would say he couldn’t eat it because he was lactose intolerant. The child had started using that line whenever he was served something he didn’t like. Oh my.

So he got the ice cream sundae, but my husband had to serve it to him because I was busy banging my head against the wall. Needless to say, that was the very last time I tried to be the sleepover queen. Now I avoid them, as much as I can. And when my kids finally whine enough that I break down and let them invite someone, I do nothing. Really. If I can arrange it, I let my husband entertain them and I hide in my room til it’s over.  That one experience was so traumatic for me, I just can’t get past it.

So come on, tell me what you don’t enjoy about parenting, that your kids love. I have more, but I’ll save the rest for another time. Reliving this sleepover nightmare has worn me out.

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    Filed Under Family, Me | 2 Comments 

    2 Responses to “Bad mom confessions”

      1
        Ashley on July 28th, 2008 9:07 am

        hahaha! Omg, that’s an AWESOME story! Heh, maybe I should start using that…although I’m pretty sure people would catch on. And btw …who doesn’t like pizza?

      2
        Sheri on July 28th, 2008 9:31 pm

        I know! Who would have ever thought a kid wouldn’t love pizza, don’t they all love cheese pizza?! Although it is a good way to get out of eating something,lol.