Oct

19

Good thoughts and prayers, I need them




Isnt it funny how quickly things can change?  Maybe funny isnt the right word.

I haven’t been feeling well for a little over a week.  My son had swine flu and while I knew I didn’t have it, I thought it was maybe just a cold or exhaustion from taking care of a sick kid. Either way, I had recently started some medication that my ob-gyn prescribed, and I was wondering if the medication was part of the problem.  I started calling her last Monday, but she wasn’t in the office one day, was doing ob stuff another, and didn’t call me back.  By Wednesday, I was feeling pretty bad.  No major symptoms, just headache, stomach ache and overall cruddy feeling. But Wednesday was definitely worse, so I went to the pharmacy and checked my blood pressure.  I’m not sure why I did that, because I haven’t had a bp problem before. But Wednesday it was 168/102, which registered as dangerously high on the bp machine.

I called my primary care doctor, of course he is not in the office on Wednesdays, but the receptionist asked another doctor who said I should go to the ER.  I did,  but by the time the triage nurse looked at me, my bp had either dropped or the machine at the pharmacy wasnt accurate.  It was down to 149/94, which is still high but the nurse said it would be hours before a doctor could see me in the ER so in her opinion, it would be fine to go home and see my doctor in his office on Thursday. So I did.

Thursday I got the only open appointment with my doctor, at 4pm.  I felt okay during the day. It was fall break so my kids were home, I took them for haircuts and to Target, and I wasn’t feeling too bad.

My bp was up to 160/94 at my doctors office.  That wasn’t his main concern though, he was primarily worried about the fact that my father had his first heart attack when he was 36 years old.  I am 40.  So my doctor did an EKG, and wasn’t happy with the results.  By then it was almost 5pm, and in the small suburban hospital connected to my doctors office, they only do heart stress tests on Tuesday and Thursday. He wanted to admit me right then, because he thought if he did that, there was a chance they would still do the stress test. No guarantee though, and he could tell I didn’t want to be admitted with my kids home and husband working late.  He said if it was life and death, he would not give me a choice, but in this case, it was up to me. I chose to schedule the test as an outpatient.  He did start me on blood pressure medication and told me if I started feeling worse to go to the ER.

The irony of all this is that we want my blood pressure to come down, but doctors and EKGs and blood tests only get me so worried that my bp stays up.  I spent the weekend resting for the most part, and by Saturday the medication was working - my bp was down to 139/84.  Much better. 

The bigger concern is the possibility of some heart blockage, which is why I am scheduled for a nuclear stress test tomorrow at 7am.  When I think about the test and the possible outcomes, I can almost feel my blood pressure rising. I can deal with medication and taking it easy and making any necessary lifestyle changes.  I cannot deal with serious heart problems.

Part of me is really pissed off that this is happening to me. I am 40 years young.  I don’t smoke, don’t drink and have recently lost weight. Why is this happening now! But on the other hand, a lot of this is genetic, and I have horrible family health history, especially with heart disease. I don’t exercise, and I do have a lot of stress in my life and don’t deal with it well at all. 

There is also the part of me that wants to curl  up with a blanket until the doctors make me better, and the part of me that wants to be a fighter and conquer this.  All that is going on in my head, and most of it is unsaid, because I’m not going to scare my family and kids.  I am afraid of the test tomorrow, but I need the test to be done, I need to know what I am facing.

I am praying and hoping that maybe the medication I just started is part of the problem with the blood pressure, and that we can adjust it and that will improve.  I am praying with all my might that there is no underlying heart problem.  Please hope for that with me, pray for that with me.

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    Filed Under Me | 9 Comments 

    9 Responses to “Good thoughts and prayers, I need them”

      1
        Michelle on October 19th, 2009 1:02 pm

        Take care. I’m thinking of you.

      2
        Sharla on October 19th, 2009 2:20 pm

        I am praying with you, too. Heart problems run in my family too. Good luck!

      3
        Nancy on October 19th, 2009 2:30 pm

        I am certainly praying for you. Please remember that worrying doesn’t go any good. Do what you can and know that you have done your best! ALl best wishes!

      4
        Robyns Online World on October 19th, 2009 3:43 pm

        At least the problem is being addressed which is a really good thing. If there is something wrong you have caught it and they can get you on the path to recovery. I just started on BP meds this year myself (at 39) so I understand the frustration. Sending lots of positive thoughts for you!

      5
        Karen R on October 19th, 2009 3:57 pm

        You are in my prayers. I hope the medication is the main problem and it can easily be corrected. Take care.

      6
        Lori Z. on October 19th, 2009 10:24 pm

        So glad that you caught this! Hopefully you can strike a good balance with the doctors pulling you and you pushing through it. We’re thinking of you.

      7
        Loralee on October 20th, 2009 12:50 am

        Ugh. I can so sympathize on crappy health issues.

        I know it is so cliche but if you haven’t got your health you haven’t got anything is so freaking true.

        Hope it gets better for you.
        xo

      8
        Sheri on October 20th, 2009 9:11 pm

        Thank you all so much, your kind words, prayers and good thoughts mean a lot.

        Robyn, I knew you had gone through some health situation awhile back that ended up with a trip to the ER too, so I know you understand how scary it can be. Once I got past the initial panic, I do know that health problems cannot be ignored, and its good that whatever it is, is finally going to be addressed.

        Loralee, I know you of all people totally understand; you have been through the wringer with health issues too. You’re right, everything comes crashing down if you aren’t healthy. I hope things are going better for you too, I know from reading your blog its been rough lately for you.

      9