May

18

Storm chasing




We’ve had a few storms in the past week or two. That’s putting it mildly. Constant dark skies, raging wind, and torrents of rain. No gentle breezes here.

I’m not talking about the weather.

I hid out today. Stayed off the computer until now. Never once checked Twitter. Joining the online party was just too much, and I couldn’t do it today.

I know that sometimes things have to get worse before they get better. You have to survive the storms before you can see the sun. I know this, but I really, really want the storms to end.  I can’t find any shelter right now, I’m just stuck in the middle of it, trying to stay on dry ground.

I keep telling myself that once my rainy season ends, the sun is going to shine so brightly, and the rainbows will be so beautiful, that the pain of the storms will fade. Because it has to stop storming sometime. Right?

Even in the midst of the storms that are wreaking havoc on my world, I was reminded today of how the smallest kind gesture can make such a huge difference. I was talking on the phone with a woman I work for. I don’t know her, I work from home so I’ve never “met” my coworkers. And this woman only calls when we’ve made a mistake. It wasn’t a serious mistake, but it needed to be brought to my attention in a more memorable way than email. So she called. She wasn’t angry at all, but she came across as exasperated. I’m sure that she had many other phone calls to make and many other fires to put out, but at the time, I took her exasperation as my fault. My failure.

There must have been something in my voice, a hint of the storms that are chasing me, because out of nowhere, her voice softened and she asked if I was okay.

The floodgates opened wide. Forget that she is my superior. Forget that I’m 41 years old. Forget that I don’t even know her. I bawled like a baby. I tried not to, but as soon as she heard the first sniffles, she kept being nice. She kept saying, honey, it’s going to be okay. The more she talked, the more I cried. Even in all the storms, I have managed to not break down, to not let it all out. Well, it all came out during that call. I needed that cry so badly.

There was no real conversation; I don’t know her well enough to spill my guts, and I don’t think she wanted that. She just wanted me to know it would be okay.

I don’t know when it will be okay. I do know that her words helped me get through this dark stormy day. We can all do what she did on the phone today. We can listen. Listen for the crack in the composure. Listen for the aching heart. Listen for the sadness. Respond to that. It is enough, no, it is so much more than enough, to just listen and encourage. Listen and offer hope where there is none.

Provide shelter from the storm, even if only for a short time. We can all do that.

This post is linked at Tuesdays Unwrapped at Chatting at the Sky

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    Filed Under Me, confessions, of the spirit | 19 Comments 

    19 Responses to “Storm chasing”

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        becky on May 19th, 2010 1:18 am

        Aw, honey. Sometimes it’s the unexpected kindnesses that cause us to completely unravel. I hope things get better for you.
        becky´s last blog ..Oops, I did it again. My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 19th, 2010 at 10:50 am

        Exactly, that came out of nowhere. Feeling a little silly for my breakdown now that I’ve had a day to fret about it :) but it actually helped.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

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        Jennifer Davis on May 19th, 2010 6:26 am

        You’ll be in my prayers today! Storm season isn’t fun…but at least God provides a beautiful rainbow at at the end!
        Jennifer Davis´s last blog ..Sleep My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 19th, 2010 at 10:51 am

        Yes, I am waiting for and counting on that rainbow. Thank you for the prayers.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

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        Cassandra Frear on May 19th, 2010 8:47 am

        God is speaking to me through your post today.

        First that in the storm it is okay if I crack, if I break down, if I lose composure once in a while. “It’s okay”

        Second, there are others whom I can comfort. This is no small thing. It feels small, because it is simple. But it is not small.

        Thanks! You may see a post on this, linking back to your blog soon!

        Oh, and read my post today on the Moonboat. You can Google the poem Hope by Emily Dickinson and read it — just beautiful.
        Cassandra Frear´s last blog ..Pausing for Technical Difficulties My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 19th, 2010 at 10:56 am

        Cassandra, I’m so glad that my “storms” might be helpful for anyone, in any small way.

        It is always good to be reminded that what we say and how we say it can have a huge effect on someone, even if we don’t realize it at the time. We never know when we are talking to someone that is in the midst of their own personal storm.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

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        Cassandra Frear on May 19th, 2010 9:06 am

        Oh, a couple of other things. I noticed that when I posted a comment, it shows a link to a post I did last week. Why is that? Can it be fixed? Is it because I unsubscribed to Disqus late last week?
        Cassandra Frear´s last blog ..Pausing for Technical Difficulties My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 19th, 2010 at 10:49 am

        Cassandra, I’m not sure how to change the comment that Comment Luv lists, I think it can be changed but not sure how. I don’t think it would have anything to do with Disqus, but I’ve never used that so I’m not sure. Sorry.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

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        Bev on May 19th, 2010 12:34 pm

        powerful post, sheri…very wise words to others…i work with the public every day, and sometimes it IS exasperating…but i just need to keep the sensitivity intact, in case someone needs to unload…i have had people here that have broken down and cried…i do feel good when i can help them..(i work in a community college counseling office)..
        always here for ya!
        Bev´s last blog ..it’s the heart that really matters in the end My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 19th, 2010 at 4:59 pm

        Thanks Bev. I always try to be sensitive, but my problem is that I’m always rushing around, caught up in my own life. I’m sure I’ve missed signs that someone needed something, anything, to get through whatever they were going through. I’m going to try to slow down and listen better, so I can “hear” whats really going on.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

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        Joy on May 19th, 2010 1:37 pm

        I prayed for you this afternoon, and thanked God for sending you a grace-person over the phone yesterday.
        Joy´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – The Cat Caught a Bird My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 19th, 2010 at 4:58 pm

        Thank you for the prayers. She truly was a grace person, and I definitely needed her yesterday. That was a blessing.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

      8
        Robyn's Online World on May 19th, 2010 3:23 pm

        Another wonderful post – you are such an amazing writer.

        I understand those storms. We are in the middle of them here also. However, I have been through more than my fair share of storm seasons and what I have learned is it is a way to make changes. Try your best to find those silver linings in the storm clouds, no matter how small.

        That was wonderful that she was able to hear that in your voice. Don’t we wish more people could do that – the world would be a better place with more compassion for sure!
        Robyn’s Online World´s last blog ..Jenda – Lifetime Voice Calendar (review) My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 19th, 2010 at 4:57 pm

        Oh Robyn, I know you’re going through it too, and I hope it gets better for you guys very soon. I “know” there are silver linings, but I can’t always see them until way after the fact. I’m looking though :) Take care.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

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        Stacey @ Tree, Root, and Twig on May 19th, 2010 9:37 pm

        I sometimes feel like a scene from a movie when the rain is only falling on one person. Those are the moments I feel most ALONE. I think it’s important for us to share glimpses into our own storms, so that others (like me!) can see that the rain falls on each of us in our own time. And that when we have the blessing of dry land, we can offer an umbrella to another. :) Wishing you find yourself either under sunny skies, or a big, protective umbrella soon.
        Stacey @ Tree, Root, and Twig´s last blog ..Sonicare for Kids {Review} My ComLuv Profile

        Sheri Reply:
        May 20th, 2010 at 8:12 am

        I feel like that too, all the time. It does help to know that others are also being rained on, and that others have survived their own stormy season. It’s hard to share, but it’s worth it.
        Sheri´s last blog ..Storm chasing My ComLuv Profile

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