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Mar
2
My baby eighth grader went to his first semi-formal dance recently. I wasn’t thrilled with the whole “semi-formal” thing at first, because it meant we had to buy some dress up clothes for him. The school counselor made it clear that semi-formal just meant no jeans/t-shirts/tennis shoes, not a tuxedo. Whew!
My son did not have a date for this dance, much to my relief. I really have nothing against dances or dates, but some of my best memories from high school are going to dances with a group of friends. We had a blast, and there were none of the expectations that might be there with a date. I want him to have fun, not drama. So he met several friends there, and afterwards spent the night with his buddies.
I worry about my boy, because like me, he can have unreasonable expectations of things. A dance could be the the “best night of his life”, if he only had a date. So for him, no date means he can relax and be himself, without aiming for that unattainable “perfect night”. We did have to have a discussion about the clothes though. He actually asked for a suit. I would love nothing more than to see my boy decked out in a suit, but that is a more money than I can spend on something he won’t wear again. We finally agreed on black dress pants, red shirt, tie and shoes. He looked great!
It was so cute to see him getting ready that night, with his dad helping him with his tie. He was excited and nervous, calling his friends constantly to make sure that no one arrived at the dance before the others. They all came back to our house after the dance, just long enough for Tanner to change clothes and grab some overnight stuff. One of the guys did have a date, and they were giving her a ride home so she came over too. The girls apparently took the semi-formal part very seriously! She looked lovely, but my first dress like that was for prom my junior year. I saw many pictures from that night and all the girls were wearing formals. Even though I wasn’t excited about the semi-formal part at first, I do think it changed the whole atmostphere of the dance for these kids. I’ve never seen my son or the other kids so excited about a school dance, and the only difference was that they were dressed up. They loved dressing up and loved seeing each other dress up, and I’m sure it made a difference in how they behaved at the dance.
Now here’s my rant – you knew it was coming, right? My husband dropped him off at the dance, and when he came home he told me there were two limos dropping off groups of kids, one a Hummer limo. Remember, this is an EIGHTH GRADE dance. Not senior prom. What do these kids have to look forward to for prom, or any other dance, if we are bringing out the big guns for EIGHTH GRADE?
I get that parents want to make these things perfect for their kids. I want my son to have a good time, I don’t care so much about perfection. I also get that if you can afford to do things like that, go right ahead. But next year, how do you top the fancy dress, corsage, dinner before the dance, bowling afterwards, and the limo? What is left to make the next four years worth of dances great and wonderful and perfect?
I grew up in a small town, so there were no limos, no restaurants, no hotels. There was only so much we could do for prom, and it was still absolutely perfect. So I don’t know what I’m getting into here. If this is what its like in eighth grade, are we talking five star restaurants, private parties and (gasp) hotels for prom? Really, I have no idea, but I’m not looking forward to the conversation where we tell our son No to the hotel idea.
Anyone have a teenager and been through the whole dance/prom thing and can tell me what I’m in for? Are limos at eighth grade dances typical? What happens in high school then, do we fly the kids in (sarcasm)? But really, what are your thoughts on this? Feel free to call me old fashioned, the label fits.
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Feb
18
peeking shyly into the blogosphere…
Hi. This blog is deserted! My fault. Let me give you the facts of life for Sheri right now:
- Graduate school. Or I should say GRADUATE SCHOOL! I am taking two classes this semester, and one of them has been known to cause people to drop out and never come back, its that hard. And time consuming. I dream about dropping out, but that’s why I waited til my third semester to take this class; I’ve got too much invested in this dream to drop out now.
- Snow days. My kids have been out of school practically more than they’ve been in school since the first of January. The first few snow days were fun; after that, not so much fun as miserable. And as soon as the weather improved:
- Sickness. My family cannot get well. We finally recovered from the swine flu epidemic, then Nolan got sick last weekend. My husband was taking the kids to Kansas so I could get some work done on my massive school project, but instead I stayed home with the sick boy. Now I am sick. Never fails.
- Busy-ness. How can a family with only two kids be so stinkin busy? Band concerts, piano contests, school dances, shopping to be done for clothes to wear to the school dances, because we apparently don’t do “semi-formal” in real life. And the best part: Every single activity/event/concert/contest/campout/field trip costs money, yay!
- Since we’re talking about money, I have to mention: Doctor visits. Prescriptions. Lab tests. ‘Nuff said.
- The winter slump has hit me hard. I don’t want to do anything, especially not anything that resembles required reading, research, citations, or attending class. Whoops, thats my whole life. What do I want to do? I want to eat ginormous amounts of baked goods, which I want someone else to prepare for me. I want to lie on the couch in a clean living room, one without tissues and medicine all over the tables. I want my house to be cleaned by someone besides me (but lets be honest, its been awhile since I’ve cleaned it). Am I asking too much, really?
So, there you have it. Blog = back burner. Actually, anything I truly enjoy = back burner right now. I am trying to write down post ideas as I have them, and I do have them, because I miss writing and having a life to write about. I keep reminding myself, I chose this, and the accompanying craziness of having a family and going back to school. Maybe I didn’t willingly choose the sickness part; that was buried in the fine print, but I chose the rest of it.
I will find my way back here to post regularly again, hopefully soon. I will conquer my schoolwork and my messy house, and maybe I’ll even bake something for myself and read a book for fun. Eventually.
Who else has a crazy life right now?
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Feb
2
We all are slowly making our way back to the land of the living after our visit from swine flu. But its slow going. I wanted to post an update, but you’ll have to excuse the randomness of my ramblings.
~My kids had a two week Christmas break. The week they went back to school, they had two snow days, so another four day weekend. Then they got a three day weekend for Martin Luther King day. Last week they got out of school early on Thursday and no school at all on Friday because of snow. Even without the flu, I would be exhausted from all the snow days! I am not enjoying this winter wonderland anymore.
~I turned 41 on Sunday. It was actually nice to be snowed in on my birthday, a very quiet day.
~I went to a meeting for parents of incoming high school students last night to learn about enrollment. I’m not sure why I was asked to attend, don’t they realize there is NO WAY my baby can be in high school?? Although that same baby keeps reminding me that he will get his driver’s permit this summer. Why does he want me to have gray hair?
~My husband and oldest son are doing the P90x program. My husband has been doing the exercise program for a few months; after the holidays he started loosely following the eating plan. Tanner started doing the exercise program in January and is also loosely following the eating plan. What this means is that there are no good snacks in my house. None. I’m all for eating healthy, but a girl needs some snacks around. Also, eating healthier means cooking more. None of this grab a bag of processed something or other and throw it in the oven. There is chopping, slicing, dicing, baking, broiling, and in my case, burning. Yes, burning. A few weekends ago, I decided to grill some steak that my inlaws had given us. My husband and Tanner were practically salivating at the thought of those steaks after a week of tuna, chicken and 500 pounds of vegetables. I started grilling when Mike and Nolan were driving home from baseball practice. I haven’t grilled in awhile, let me just say that. So when the smoke alarm went off, I ignored it. Must be malfunctioning, why would the smoke alarm in the house go off when I’m grilling outside? When that thought sunk in, I ran outside to find the back of the house covered in smoke. The flames were so out of control I could not open the grill for about 20 minutes after I turned it off. So when Mike got home, starving for steak, to find a plate with baked fish and a pile of veggies waiting for him, he was not happy. We all cried that night.
~I am not doing the P90x program with the guys. I may have told them that I am diligently doing the workouts during the day, when I’m home alone. That may have been a small lie fib. The truth is more like when I’m home alone I sometimes pick up the exercise dvds and move them off the table. To make room for my snack. Then I remember, NO SNACKS! I’m really suffering through their fitness program, and I do not appreciate it.
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Nov
18
Last weekend one of my youngest sons friends spent the weekend with us. The boys had a LEGO Robotics competition and his parents had to be out of town, so we had a guest.
I was worried that they boys would be bored spending almost 2 1/2 days together, so I was trying to think of something to do Saturday night. It was finally starting to feel like November, so my first thought was to rent a movie. Ok, thats always my first thought, I love movies. The only other thing I came up with was to go to a movie….which sounds pretty much the same, but its not. Really.
Anyway, no one was real excited about my suggestions. I don’t know about you, but I always wonder if every other family does all kinds of fascinating things on the weekends. So I was worried that my sons friend would be bored to tears by our couch potato-y weekend.
My husband does not worry about anything, and certainly not about entertaining our children, but he is really good at coming up with fun things to do that don’t involve electronics. Out of nowhere he suggested making a fire in the fire pit and cooking dinner over it. Finally, something better than a movie! I was pretty impressed, and the boys perked right up and got everything ready themselves.
They made grilled cheese sandwiches and roasted marshmallows. I noticed that our guest wasn’t eating the marshmallows, so I asked if he liked them. He solemnly explained that he only liked them in smores. Well! As the hostess, what choice did I have but to run right to the store to get chocolate and graham crackers! Anything for a guest 
When I got back and we commenced with the smores making and smores eating, my son was telling his friend about how when Halloween was over, my husband had the grand idea to blow up a pumpkin with some old firecrackers. (He swears it was the boys’ idea… right). Kyle listened intently, sighed, and said that his family never does anything fun like blowing things up or starting fires in the backyard.
Awww, can you think of a better compliment than that? We are fun! We do exciting weekend activities! (Never mind that some parents might not approve of the blowing up stuff type activities. It was all done in the name of scientific research, really)
The sleepover weekend was a huge success. I felt like Martha Stewart, only with gooey marshmallows and chocolate dripping down my chin. Yum.
I really wanted to take a picture of us in all our fiery, chocolatey glory, but eating smores takes two hands. A girl has to prioritize.
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Nov
9
Tonight my youngest son, husband and I were hanging out in the living room. I don’t watch much TV, but I was taking a break from my homework. My husband was watching football and flipping the channel back and forth to whatever my son wanted to watch. Finally my son sighed, got up, walked over to me and asked:
Can I just go read my book?
Sweeter words were never spoken That boy takes after his mother!
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Oct
28
My kids Crack.Me.Up. Even if I try very hard to not laugh, I still crack up. Nolan said this a few days ago and I am still laughing, so I have to share it. Keep in mind that this conversation came out of nowhere, during dinner.
Nolan: Do they neuter the animals in the zoo?
Me: I don’t think so, but why would you ask about that? (cause I want to know the thought process that led to this question!)
Nolan: Well, I just wondered, because the zookeeper probably doesn’t want the animals entertaining themselves in front of the little kids at the zoo.
Silence all around the dinner table. Until I cracked up. Who is that kid and what goes on in his brain?
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Oct
14
As an added bonus for my loyal blog readers (yes plural!) I’m going to start sharing words of wisdom that my kids so willingly share with me. I know that this stuff is so valuable I should charge for it, but I’m going to share it for free. Write this down people, because you’ll probably never hear it anywhere else.
This is a conversation I had with my 14 year old last night. Background info: he does his own laundry, not because he is so helpful that way, but because mom got tired of the daily laundry requests.
Tanner: Is it too late to do a load of laundry? I need to wash whites.
Mom: I guess not, but don’t just throw in yours, throw in all the whites in the hamper.
Tanner (after finding very few whites in the hamper): Do these gray shorts count as white? (the shorts are white and light gray)
Mom: yes
Tanner (back with a few more things): Do these black jeans count as white?
Mom: shocked silence, absolutely nothing to say to that. He was actually waiting for the answer though, so I eventually had to get up off the floor, stop laughing, and explain that NO, black does not count as white.
Don’t you wish you lived at my house? The hilarity never stops. Just do not let my son do your laundry.
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Oct
7
I made it through my mammogram and ultrasound this morning – for those of you hesitating to get a mammogram, Just Do It!
But now, something even more dreaded than a mammogram is trying to infiltrate my home. The Flu. Or some other- but just as evil- illness. I am not letting that sucker in here.
My poor son came home from school today and promptly put on thermal underwear, 2 pairs of pants and 2 sweatshirts. He was freezing and burning up and coughing. I’ve been feeling cruddy all day too, in fact I pulled myself away from the computer and actually rested on the couch all afternoon. (hi couch, nice to meet ya. Now I know why you’re so popular. I may have to visit more often).
I refuse to get sick. Will.Not.Get.Sick. Who has time for that anyway? I’m going to go ahead and refuse to let my kids get sick, too. I will not tolerate this! Surely if I blog about it, it must be true, right?
Are your kids sick? Are you sick? Or just getting over being sick? I’m being more than my usual worry wart these days. Last week a local teenager started having flu like symptoms on Tuesday; he died on Thursday. So to say I am worried about my family getting sick is a bit of an understatement.
Repeat after me: We Will Not Get Sick.
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Sep
23
My youngest son wants a cell phone. He has wanted one for awhile, but now that he’s in sixth grade and everyone has a cell phone, he is especially desperate for one. I offered to let him carry one of our old ones and just always say his phone died, but he didn’t go for that
Unlike his teenage brother, whose method for getting what he wants is limited to asking then wailing when the answer is no, my little guy knows the subtle art of persuasion. In other words, he is trying to manipulate his mama with his cuteness. Oh yes he is.
For instance, puppy dog eyes. He does it well, and he does it often. Tell me this face is not irrestible-
(I had to include the actual puppy with the boy and his puppy dog eyes, so you see the full irrestibility)
I am particularly vulnerable to this boy and his puppy dog eyes, because he is so desperate for a phone that he drops his manly attitude and is all “hug me mommy”. He knows what works, the sly dog.
He went on a campout last weekend and used one of his friends’ phone to text me. Often. I guess to show me his fine texting skillz… Which are so fine that I have to share the texts with you:
Nolan: Hi mommy yer stil at the church (translation: we’re still at the church)
Me: Hi honey, have a good time.
Nolan: Dont text me again im on davids fone
Then my older son sent him a text, because when someone tells you not to text them, you must respond!
Nolan: david is taking hi fone awa so dont text me but i dont think that os fairatall (translation: david is taking his phone away so don’t text me, but I don’t think that is fair at all)
Nolan: member to call att (translation: Remember to call AT&T and ask how much it will cost to get him a phone)
Nolan: Seriousli
Nolan: U better
Nolan: Seriousli before o get home (translation: seriously before I get home)
Nolan: Davids fone is dying dont text again (notice that I have NOT been texting him!)
Nolan: hi mom imon dads fone now (translation: hi mom I’m on dad’s phone now)
Nolan: dad wants his fone back already wich is totaly ufair by (translation: dad wants his phone back already which is totally unfair. bye)
Well. I think we all can agree that the child is a texting prodigy. Seriously, I was laughing so hard getting those texts from him.
Adorableness and texting genius aside, that boy is still not getting a fone. Wich is totaly ufair.
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Sep
16
If you see my son, he will hold the door open for you. If you drop something, he will bend down and pick it up for you. He’s helpful that way.
If you see my son, he’ll shake your hand and say Nice to meet you. He’ll look you in the eye and answer your questions. He’ll make small talk and laugh at your jokes, even if they are lame. I know this because he laughs at mine.
If you see my son, he’ll say please and thank you.
If you see my son, your kids will like him. The under five year old set adores him, because he’s young enough to act goofy with them and old enough to be endlessly patient. He’s a great babysitter.
If you see my son and need help, go ahead and ask. He likes to help as long as it doesn’t involve cleaning his bedroom.
If you see my son, you might be surprised at how articulate and pleasant he is. We don’t always see that side of him at home, but he is.
Oh, one more thing.
If you see my son, he’ll be the one with the longish, shaggy hair that partially covers his eyes. It’s dyed black. He’ll probably be wearing these big goofy black rimmed glasses. Not because he needs glasses, but because he thinks they look funky. And they go well with his skinny jeans, which he wears a lot. He might be dressed in all black or dark clothes, depending on his fashion mood that morning. He might be wearing wrist bands, not because he cuts, but because he thinks they look funky.
What will you do if you see my son?
I hope you won’t roll your eyes, or give me a sympathetic look because clearly he must be an out of control delinquent. Don’t scowl at him or move to the other side of the aisle. Don’t assume anything about him.
If you see my son, look past the hair and clothes. Toss out any initial judgment you might want to make based on his appearance, and give him a chance. Don’t miss an opportunity to meet a really great kid.
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